January 30, 2023
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  • [ January 30, 2023 ] Stuck In The Middle, It’s Time For The Portland Trail Blazers To Make A Difficult Choice Portland Trail Blazers
  • [ January 30, 2023 ] Wild Weekend For The Portland Winterhawks Net 6 Points, Now First In US Division Portland Winterhawks
  • [ January 27, 2023 ] XFL Season Is Coming – Why You Should Watch The New And Improved Football League National
  • [ January 27, 2023 ] The Good, Bad, And Tears Of Basketball National
  • [ January 26, 2023 ] The 3 Must-Watch Football Games On The Oregon Ducks’ 2023 Schedule Oregon Ducks
HomeAuthorsPatrick McNerthney

Articles by Patrick McNerthney

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About Patrick McNerthney
Patrick McNerthney is a former President, Titan of Industry and general Society-Improver. He owns a business called Outcasting, which purportedly offers writing services, but is most likely a front for the illegal import and distribution of vacant hermit crab shells. Patrick aspires to own an NFL team and take over his block. He’s written four books: How to Break Out of Prison*, How to Cheat on Your Taxes*, How to Steal Your Neighbor’s Roof*, and The Future Will Not Involve Underwear**. *Not written yet **Not formatted or published yet
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National

Badminton – What You Don’t Know Could Literally Murder Your Face

April 6, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Badminton – What You Don’t Know Could Literally Murder Your Face

The arrival of spring begats high pollen counts, winter rainstorms if one lives in the Pacific Northwest or Alaska, and the annual “Raising of the Backyard Badminton Net,” celebrated every April 9th as part of […]

National

Letting Go Of Sports Trauma Likely Makes Room For More Sports Trauma

March 28, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Letting Go Of Sports Trauma Likely Makes Room For More Sports Trauma

We throw around accusations of compartmentalization all the time now, mostly to point out people are likely doing it to: (a.) survive the remaining seven weeks of winter around these parts (despite various Really Good-Looking […]

National

Reflecting On The Past Just Brings Jai Alai Back To Life

February 24, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Reflecting On The Past Just Brings Jai Alai Back To Life

The opening sequence to the ‘80s narcotics interdiction/buddy crime-noir drama Miami Vice featured some incredible guitar riffs, sweet bongo drum reverberations, flashy splashy neon-bathed images of Miami that made us want to hang out at South Beach, […]

National

Nicknames Ensure Sports Greatness Or At Least That Somebody Sort Of Likes You

February 17, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Nicknames Ensure Sports Greatness Or At Least That Somebody Sort Of Likes You

A recent internal poll revealed nine of the 37 members of our executive leadership team excelled in athletics at either the collegiate or professional level. While our legal department hasn’t tested the veracity of this […]

National

Boost Your Status In Society With The Right Super Bowl Foodstuffs

February 10, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Boost Your Status In Society With The Right Super Bowl Foodstuffs

Oh, back to the food. The Super Bowl is the second-largest day for American food consumption after Thanksgiving. Thus the year-long recipe hoarding we mentioned in last week’s expose, Semantics Play a Big Role in This […]

National

Semantics Play A Big Role In This Year’s Super Bowl

February 3, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Semantics Play A Big Role In This Year’s Super Bowl

The two weeks between the conference championship games and Super Bowl LVI are not stressful like the two weeks before the federal individual tax filing and payment deadline, generally known as Tax Day.  It may […]

National

There’s A Good Reason Why Pro Athletes Think They Can Fly

January 27, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on There’s A Good Reason Why Pro Athletes Think They Can Fly

Given the general assumption by those of athletic-minded persuasions that their excellence within a given sport is automatically transferable to another sport, it’s not surprising to find a somewhat meteoric rise of contrast therapy over […]

National

Racquetball Is More Complicated Than You Think

January 20, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Racquetball Is More Complicated Than You Think

Athletic types have a misconception that excellence at a given sport is automatically transferable to another sport. This faulty logic is most evident in horse racers concluding they can drive NASCAR, swimmers thinking they can […]

National

There’s More To Our Beloved Sports Franchises’ Names Than We Think

January 13, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on There’s More To Our Beloved Sports Franchises’ Names Than We Think

Our colleague who went to prison got a lot of props, possibly survived, because he was really good at basketball. He’s probably still really good at basketball, but now he’s middle-aged, so body parts don’t […]

National

Alabama Vs. Georgia May Be More Educational Than You Think

January 6, 2022 Patrick McNerthney Comments Off on Alabama Vs. Georgia May Be More Educational Than You Think

In much simpler times, we could turn on the television on January 1st and click between three major broadcast networks to watch 72 straight hours of post-season, NCAA Division I Football Bowl Subdivision games and shave […]

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